Here’s what’s going on with Baby Gillis developmentally this week (from BabyCenter):

Your baby’s about 15.7 inches long now, and he weighs almost 3 pounds (like a head of cabbage). A pint and a half of amniotic fluid surrounds him, but that volume will decrease as he gets bigger and takes up more room in your uterus. His eyesight continues to develop, though it’s not very keen; even after he’s born, he’ll keep his eyes closed for a good part of the day. When he does open them, he’ll respond to changes in light but will have 20/400 vision — which means he can only make out objects a few inches from his face. (Normal adult vision is 20/20.)

How far along: 30 weeks.

Total weight gain: Approximately 31 pounds! [I miscounted my weight gain last week; I gained 29 pounds in 29 weeks of pregnancy!]

Pictures:

{What I’m Wearing: T-shirt, skinny jeans: Motherhood Maternity; tank: Gap (non-maternity); grey flats, scarf: NY & Company; sunglasses: WalMart bargain!}

Maternity clothing: Jordan and I went to Sioux Falls last weekend, and we picked up a pair of maternity jean shorts and a pair of maternity capris (thanks, Mom!). With the weather hitting the 90-degree mark last weekend, it was high time that I invested in some summer maternity clothes, much to my chagrin. I also picked up two more bras, because my breasts won’t stop growing – so annoying!

Best moment of the week: Hearing the baby’s heartbeat on Monday at my regular prenatal check-up; finalizing the introduction and first chapter drafts of my M.A. thesis, which is due for committee feedback next week – only one more chapter to revise/finalize!

Food cravings: Lemonade, lemonade, lemonade!

Symptoms: Having a few uncomfortable twinges in my belly, but they don’t last long and are quite random. Also have been noticing that baby boy loves to bunch himself up in a ball of sorts on one side of my belly, which is super uncomfortable; baby’s just loving to pull and push around my insides! My breasts also leaked colostrom last weekend – it was hilarious!

Movement: Baby moves all the time, and he moves my entire belly sometimes! I love to feel him move, even when I’m trying to sleep!

Belly button: It looks so weird! It’s hard to describe, but it looks like the tied end of a balloon that you blow up for a birthday party. Hasn’t popped out (yet).

Baby “stuff” report: Last weekend, when Jordan and I were in Sioux Falls, we stopped by my parents’ house in Brandon to bring home two totes full of baby clothes and baby blankets! We’ve been storing all of the little man’s clothes at my parents’ house, since we don’t have much room in our apartment, but it’s made me so sad not to have any of our baby’s things around – I want to nest so badly, but we’re still waiting to hear when we can move in to our new 2-bedroom apartment. So, I brought home the totes to wash baby clothes and have baby things around to ease my urge to nest. I love looking at all of his little clothes and imagining him wearing them…I can’t wait to meet this little boy!

What I’m looking forward to: Turning in a draft of my thesis project to my committee on Tuesday! I’ve been working tirelessly on drafting it for the past few weeks, and I’ve been researching since last summer. Needless to say, I’m ready for a (little) break before I defend the thesis in May! I’m already anxious for the thesis project to come to an end, even though it’s been a great experience.

What I miss: Having semi-normal dreams; while I’ve always had vivid dreams, I have had many a disturbing dream during my pregnancy. For instance, I dreamt on Wednesday night that I was stuck in a large shopping mall after hours (with Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes, nonetheless!), and I had to complete all of these challenges and tasks in order to get to my husband, who was trying to rescue me! So strange.

Last appointment details: I had my 29-week check-up appointment on Monday, April 2. All is well with baby and me – I gained two pounds in two weeks, bringing my total weight gain to around 31 pounds, which my doctor says is average. Baby’s heartbeat was at 150 bpm – what a strong little guy!

Next appointment: Thursday, April 19. I have my 32-week ultrasound in the morning, followed by a regular prenatal check-up. I can’t wait to see our little man one more time inside my belly before we meet him in the real world!

Here’s what’s going on with Baby Gillis developmentally this week (from BabyCenter):

Your baby now weighs about 2 1/2 pounds (like a butternut squash) and is a tad over 15 inches long from head to heel. His muscles and lungs are continuing to mature, and his head is growing bigger to make room for his developing brain. To meet his increasing nutritional demands, you’ll need plenty of protein, vitamin C, folic acid, and iron. And because his bones are soaking up lots of calcium, be sure to drink your milk (or find another good source of calcium, such as cheese, yogurt, or enriched orange juice). This trimester, about 250 milligrams of calcium are deposited in your baby’s hardening skeleton each day.

How far along: 29 weeks.

Total weight gain: Approximately 29 pounds!

Pictures:

{What I’m Wearing: Dress – Francesca’s Collections; black leggings – Motherhood Maternity; blue ring – Francesca’s Collections}

Sleep habits: At about 26 weeks pregnant, I felt like I could never get comfortable enough to sleep for longer than an hour or two, but now that I’m at 29 weeks, I’ve finally been able to sleep comfortably for a few hours, and sometimes for the entire night (if my bladder allows, which it usually doesn’t – for example, I was up three times last night to use the bathroom!). My saving grace: a body pillow that I literally bear hug during the night. I also have been dealing with not-so-pleasant night sweats – yuck – so I’ve been sleeping in big t-shirts (thanks, brother Brian!), and that seems to have helped. I still LOVE sleep, and I aim to get around 10-12 hours of sleep per night. (Yes, I know, that’s a ton of sleep, and yes, I know, this sleep pattern will change once the baby arrives!)

Maternity clothing: I’m rocking out two pairs of maternity jeans (one bootcut from Motherhood Maternity, one skinny from Old Navy) and one maternity jean skirt from Motherhood Maternity. I have two maternity dresses (one from Ann Taylor LOFT, one from Old Navy), one of which I’ll be wearing to my baby shower next weekend! I have probably 10-12 maternity shirts that I rotate, and I’m lucky – a lot of my pre-pregnancy shirts still fit, since I have always been a fan of wearing looser-fitting shirts!

However, I’m noticing that as the temperatures rise, I’m having to trade in some well-fitting sweaters for something more lightweight and breathable. I don’t have many summer-like maternity shirts yet, apart from a couple of maternity t-shirts and tank tops for layering, but what I have is working for now! When I’m at home writing my thesis or bumming around, I wear comfy elastic sweatpants or gym shorts (non-maternity) around the house with big t-shirts. I have a Belly Band that still works sometimes, but I swear, I have about one more week (if that) in some of my jeans before even the Belly Band can’t make them work!

Best moment of the week: Watching my whole belly move when the baby kicked on Sunday night – it looked like an alien had taken over my belly; feeling the baby kick my ribs for the first time on Tuesday morning while I was eating cereal; watching Wyatt try to bark at our neighbors while holding his ball in his mouth.

Food cravings: This week (and the past two weeks), it’s been all about the strawberries. Let’s just say this: I purchased a container of strawberries on Monday morning, and the entire container was gone by Tuesday night. ‘Nuff said. Am also craving lemonade (must be the gorgeous spring weather!), and kettle chips are tasting so yummy right now.

Symptoms: Some lower back pain, of course, since I’m carrying around 20 extra pounds, mostly in my belly. Sore, still growing breasts. Numb legs when I sleep, but as soon as I stretch out my calf muscles, I feel fine. Difficulty getting out of bed and off the couch, either from a sitting position or while lying down. The baby loves to hang out low in my belly, which is totally not comfortable and usually inspires me to (gently) get after our sweet baby boy to move it.

Movement: Our little man moves all the time – I feel so, so blessed. I love feeling kicks and hiccups, and every little twinge that he makes immediately puts a smile on my face.

Recent Baby Purchases: I purchased a nursing cover from Udder Covers (only paid shipping, thanks to a coupon!); a mobile for the baby’s crib from Etsy; and a lullaby CD from iTunes (Essie Jain’s Until the Light of Morning: Original Lullabies for Babies and Grown-Ups). We also plan to purchase a car seat for the baby next week!

What I’m Looking Forward To: Doctor’s appointments every two weeks – I hate waiting a month to hear the little man’s heartbeat! Also – my baby shower!

What I Miss: All of my cute spring and summer dresses that don’t fit anymore :/

Last Appointment Details: Baby boy’s heartbeat was strong at 130 bpm; I gained eight pounds between weeks 22 and 27.

Next Appointment: Monday, April 2.

As I sit here and write this post [I'm writing it on Wednesday night, but you won't see this until Thursday!], I’m cuddled up next to Wyatt the Dog and I just finished watching the fourth-to-last episode of my favorite show ever, “One Tree Hill.” My husband is seated on the other end of the couch, anxiously watching the Seattle Sounders MLS soccer game on his computer. And the baby? Well, baby boy’s a-kickin’ in my belly, of course!

This past week, my 26th week, has been a great one for me. With Mother Nature finally loosening its grasp on winter, spring time seems to be pushing full steam ahead. Temperatures have been so pleasant around here for the past few days, and Wyatt the Dog and I have taken advantage – we’ve gone on a long walk outside everyday this week since Saturday, which has been wonderful. In the winter, I feel so sluggish and out of shape, because I am not a gym person, so I tend to cuddle up with my extra pounds come snow season. But now that spring is on its way, it feels wonderful to be active, especially with a little baby in my belly that seems to love walks, too!

I’ve also been eating a lot healthier as of late, thanks (mostly) to a week or so spent at home with my Mother’s good home-cooking AND my husband’s diligent reminders to eat more fruit and drink more water. I’ve consumed seven or eight oranges in the past two weeks, which is a lot for me, and nearly every glass of water I drink is seasoned with a fresh lemon or two and a lime – my new obsession. I’ve been drinking a TON of water with lemon and lime, and I haven’t been indulging in too much soda pop, either, which has me feeling healthy, too!

Here’s my 27-week baby belly; check it out!

It’s been so much fun to feel the baby move around in my belly – the little man moves around ALL THE TIME, and I feel so blessed to say that, since I remember wondering how the baby was doing early on in my pregnancy, before he was moving around enough for me to feel him – it’s wonderful to have the reassurance that the baby’s still in there, kickin’ away and growing healthy and strong!

Jordan and I have been slowly accumulating baby-related items over the past few months (we waited until late January/early February to really start purchasing baby gear), and we’re so excited to say that we’ve finally, FINALLY decided on a color scheme for the nursery! We’ve ordered the fabric for our crib bedding, which my Mom will sew for us, and we can’t wait to deck out the little man’s nursery.

Here’s a taste of the color scheme that we’ve decided on; for all of you soccer fans out there, the lime green in the picture below is Sounders green, which delights Jordan, of course!

We couldn’t be happier with the color scheme that we’ve chosen; all of the fabrics that we’ve purchased came from Carousel Designs. I don’t have anything but great things to say about Carousel Designs; I ordered three different batches of fabric swatches from them in order to make our final decision on crib bedding, and I couldn’t be more pleased. I just can’t wait for our crib bedding fabric to arrive! In terms of what the rest of the nursery will look like, we’ve been slowly collecting a few special items to include in the baby’s room, and we only have the “big” things (like the crib and crib mattress) left to purchase…but you’ll have to wait until the nursery reveal to get more details! :)

I’ve been keeping a journal for our little man for quite a while now, and I’ve written almost fifty letters to our baby boy – it’s been such a wonderful way for me to reflect on my pregnancy! I plan to continue writing letters to our son throughout his life; it’s such an enjoyable thing for me to do every few days, and it’s helped me to focus on how blessed I feel to be a Mama-to-be.

I can’t believe that I’ve hit the 27-week mark – in only 13(ish) weeks, I’ll be a Mama! I feel so, so grateful for the opportunity to be a Mama, and I know that this baby boy will bless our lives in many ways. Here’s to 13 more weeks!

Hi everyone!

This afternoon, I took stock of all of the goals that I need to complete by October 27, 2012, when my 101 in 1001 experiment ends. My list is rather lengthy still, but I hope to be able to accomplish a majority of these goals both before and after our little man arrives in June!

Here’s my list:

- Take dance lessons with Jordan.

- Fingerpaint with Jordan.

- Go camping with Jordan.

- Hide out in a cabin for a weekend in the winter with Jordan.

- Visit a new zoo. (Fun activity for Jordan and I to do with the baby – I’m thinking of the zoo in Watertown, SD!)

- Try skiing again. (SCARED OUT OF MY MIND)

- Ride a roller coaster.

- Go kayaking.

- Go to the circus. (TERRIFIED)

- Build a snowman.

- Go ice skating.

- Send Brian a care package at college.

- Go on a mission trip. (Not likely, since I’m pregnant and will be mother to a newborn.)

- Visit a Spanish-speaking country. (Again, not likely.)

- Visit Washington, Dc. (Not likely – not in the budget!)

- Learn how to make one type of fish, and make it for Jordan.

- Make a recipe from one of my Mom’s Rachael Ray cookbooks.

- Be a member of (or start) a book club.

- Read for at least 15 minutes per day for a month. (Hopefully when the baby comes, I’ll read to him this often!)

- Spend a day at the spa. (I’m going to gift this to myself in May, when I’m hugely pregnant!)

- Volunteer x2.

- Pay for someone’s order behind me in the drive-thru.

- Find a prayer for me and Jordan to recite before dinner.

- Take Wyatt on a walk every day for a month. (Again, hopefully when our baby comes, we’ll walk every day outside in the stroller with Wyatt!)

- Work out at least 3 times per week for 6 months. (Not likely, at least at that interval – that’s quite ambitious, and ambitious I am not – at least when it comes to exercise.)

- Try beets…again. (EWW, GROSS!)

- Purchase products from Aquagene Spa in Ft. Myers. (Maybe my pal Jessica can go there and buy me some – she’s in Naples right now for an internship!)

- Buy one item from ModCloth each month for a year. (This is not likely, since I’m pregnant and nothing fits me from there right now – boo!)

- Make at least one piece of jewelry.

- Read “Pride & Prejudice.”

- Watch “Animal House.”

- Interview my Dad.

- Build a gingerbread house.

- Learn how to make a quilt. (Maybe I can watch my Mom make the one she’s planning to make for the baby?)

- Donate blood. (Not likely, as I’m pregnant and then will be nursing a newborn.)

- Take one shot of tequila.

- Keep an indoor plant alive for a year. (Not likely – plants can be unsafe for babies!)

- Play piano for 5 minutes a day for a month. (Not likely, since we don’t currently own one.)

What do YOU want to achieve this year?

I can hardly believe it – I’ll be 24 weeks pregnant tomorrow! It’s crazy to think that this journey is already halfway over, and that baby boy Gillis and I have made it through 24 weeks together – I’m so excited and anxious and am feeling so blessed to have the opportunity to be a Mama.

I’ve been writing letters to our little boy a few times a week since before we even conceived a child, and this week, I told our baby all about my trip this past weekend to Minneapolis. My parents, my brother and I traveled to Minneapolis to do some shopping for the baby and to see my cousin Kristen, and we had a wonderful time! What was surprising to me, however, was how tired and sore I was after shopping the entire weekend! I’m usually such a go-go-go shopper that I don’t even notice when I’ve been shopping all day, but this weekend was so, so different; after a few hours of shopping, my lower back began to ache, and after one day of shopping, I had a bit of swelling around my ankles! I think I pushed myself a bit too hard this weekend in terms of walking the outlet malls, IKEA and the Mall of America, all in the span of two days – what an interesting learning experience!

We heard our little boy’s heartbeat again on Friday at our regular prenatal appointment, and it was 140 beats per minute and strong. I love hearing the heartbeat – it’s so reassuring to know that the baby is a-growing and healthy in there! At my prenatal appointment, I found out that I had gained TWELVE POUNDS between my last appointment (just one month ago) and this appointment. For a girl who hasn’t really had any weight gain so far in my pregnancy (due to me feeling so sick for five weeks!), I think that my doctor was a bit shocked. It didn’t help that I mentioned my obsession with Cheetos, too, which prompted the doctor to recommend that I ration myself in terms of eating Cheetos – BOO! :) I know that Cheetos have like zero nutritional value, and I rarely eat them when I’m not pregnant, but it’s so funny to me that I’m susceptible to strange pregnancy cravings like Cheetos (and any other orange foods, like orange soda, mac & cheese, nachos, etc.). I promised my doctor that I would try to eat better this month, so here goes nothing!

One more belly picture, because I’m feeling so big (and yes, I’m aware that I will continue to grow bigger and bigger as the weeks pass by!):

Lots of love, Sara & Baby Boy

My BabyCenter pregnancy app told me today that my due date is in 120 days. Can you believe that? I remember when it was closer to 200 days, and I wondered if time would ever pass by, if I would EVER be close to meeting this little man in my belly, and now it’s only 120 days! That feels so soon.

It’s crazy to think that if all goes well, I’ll be a Mama to a little boy in 120 days or less (or more, I suppose, if the baby is pokey). My Mom and I have been taking inventory of the baby clothes that we’ve purchased thus far. I’ve also been hard at work making lists of things to look for and buy before the baby arrives. My baby registries have been consistently updated since January. My husband and I plan to purchase the rest of our cloth diapers in March. We’ve purchased adorable fabric that my Mom will fashion into crib sheets. We’ve selected a paint color for the baby’s changing table/dresser. My husband and I have lovingly selected a name for our little boy.

In other words, plans are a-flowin’ around these parts, and yet, what I’m finding is that in spite of all of this baby-prep that I’ve been immersing myself in for the past few months, I still feel like me, the authentic me that exists and thrives outside of the preparation I’ve been doing to take on the role of Mama. And even more so, I feel exhilarated – not frightened - by the way in which my selfhood will change when I meet my little man for the first time.

How is it possible to retain one’s selfhood when facing such a monumental life change as becoming a mother? I often wonder that, especially when I overhear conversations, or read blog posts, or learn from other Mama’s, who say that their lives have been completely and meaningfully altered with the arrival of their little child, yet they still feel inherently like their true selves. Some Mama’s have even revealed that in taking on the role of Mama, they are able to reclaim more of their authentic self; they are able to tap into an authentic selfhood that they never knew existed.

Yet, in order to trust this notion, in order to believe all of these experienced Mama’s, all I need to think about is the me that existed before my marriage to Jordan, as compared to the me that exists today, 1.5 years (and counting) later. I still feel like me, the Sara that is overly dramatic, a bit of a worrier, a bit selfish, but is also compassionate, concerned, loving and passionate. However, in looking back on my first year or so of marriage, I now feel a new sense of identity that has shaped me as I’ve taken on the role of wife. I’m now a little bit more focused on viewing my life as a journey, a marathon, a joint effort between my husband and I that is focused on achieving our dreams and goals. Since I’ve been married, I’m more aware of and deeply appreciative of the way in which my husband loves and cares for me (especially after my bout with morning sickness). In other words, I feel like my selfhood has changed as I’ve become a wife because I’m more able to step outside of my dramatic, selfish self to appreciate what it means to be loved and to love someone else in such a life-altering way.

While up until now, taking on the role of wife has been the most life-altering change I’ve made in terms of chasing after my authentic self, I think often about the way in which my heart will expand and grow five times its size (much like the Grinch!) upon meeting my little man for the first time. Sure, I know that there will be ways in which I will change that will seem frustrating – I will (most likely) worry more – even though that seems impossible for a worrier like me; I know that I will feel the desperation and the electricity of loving someone so much because he came from me, and from my husband; I know that I will endure frustrating disappointments along with lightning moments of success as I constantly judge myself as a Mama against the barometer of what a good mother should be, in my mind.

Yet, I know and trust that for mothers everywhere, becoming a Mama doesn’t mean that we lose ourselves, that we lose our quirks, our dreams, our goals, ourselves. Sure, we change; our selfhood changes upon encountering and fulfilling such a life-altering role as mothers. But, I have to believe that for all mothers, if we all were so meaningfully and irrevocably changed, so much so that we didn’t even recognize ourselves anymore, and if this change wasn’t a powerfully good thing, I know that mothers wouldn’t desire to become mothers; I know that this desire that I felt (and feel) in my heart to become a Mama wouldn’t persist in such a powerful way. In other words, I know that God’s masterful plan – the plan that has blessed me with the opportunity to be a Mama in the first place – includes a plan for a meaningful nurturing of who I am now, my authentic self as it currently stands, as well as a plan for the life-changing alteration of who I will become as I take on the Mama role.

It’s a crazy thing to be on the cusp of, motherhood. When I was engaged and planning my wedding, Jordan and I read a book on questions to ask and answer as a couple on the cusp of marriage. We also took part in a premarital counseling session with our pastor, my Uncle Rick. Both were so helpful to Jordan and I, both individually and as a couple, that I knew that I wanted to take the time to think intelligently and critically throughout my pregnancy about what kind of mother I wanted to be.

One of the activities that Jordan and I have done since we were married is on every New Year’s Eve, we recap the previous year, and we plan and dream for the year ahead. It’s one of my most favorite things to do every holiday season, and I think that both Jordan and I are surprised at how far we’ve come each year in achieving our personal and shared goals. This year was no different – we were so excited and blessed to be expecting a child, and we were on the cusp of one of the most important roles of our lives: parents. During our year-end discussion around New Year’s 2011, Jordan and I discussed not only what we want to achieve personally in 2012, but also what we want our family to look like, and how we see ourselves developing as parents.

When thinking about what kind of parents we want to be, we discussed how we want to be wholly supportive of our children’s aspirations, which, to us, means that we want to encourage them to dream and to take part in activities that interest them. We discussed how important it is for our family that I am able to be at home with our child (and with any future children, should we be blessed with such an opportunity) as long as it is financially feasible to do so. We discussed our educational priorities for our children, especially in terms of the Montessori philosophy that we want to introduce to our child from birth on. We also want to do our best to educate our children on what is often considered to be the “dangerous” parts of life (i.e. drugs, alcohol) by having frank and honest discussions with them regarding the importance of their choices and the lasting impact of the decisions that they make as young adults.

I have a BabyCenter pregnancy app on my phone, and what I love about this app is that it not only lets me know what is going on with my baby boy in my belly, but it also asks me critical questions to help me think about what it will mean to be a Mama after our little man arrives. All I know now about motherhood (apart from a few basic care-taking practices) is that I want my little boy to know that I am in love with him already (that I’ve been in love with him before we even conceived him), and the way in which I’ve been able to show that and channel that feeling throughout my entire pregnancy (and even before we conceived our child!) is by writing letters to my son. It’s a secret project that I’ve been working on (I’ve only shared my letters with Jordan and with my Mom), and I’m so excited to continue writing to our little man throughout the rest of my pregnancy and throughout his life. I can’t wait to give these letters to my son someday.

While it can be impossible to predict what motherhood will be like for me, I know that it’s been worth my time to think intelligently about what kind of mother I want to be. I know that I have a Type-A personality, and while my personality type helps to explain my hyper-active planning tendencies regarding our efforts to get ready for the baby in terms of clothing and baby gear, I hope that with motherhood, I am able to follow the lead of my baby boy and model my role as a mother around his needs.